SMART WAY TO MAKE FRIENDS

You can make friends. There is no one who doesn’t need a friend. Remember the old adage – no one is an island? When there are billions of people around the world, why live alone?

Though having friends is good, making friends is an art. For most of us, it comes naturally (in that sense, we are all artists!). Nevertheless, learning this art is helpful and productive.

Though there are many ways to make friends, here is a smart way to do that: Be a friend to others! Though it appears simplistic, it is, in fact, the foundation for all other ways. Without this, nothing works.

Sometimes we wait for others to take the initiative to become our friend. It comes in thoughts like “Let him call me. Then I will call him” or “Why should I go after her? If she needs me, let her come to me”.  Though it may sound logical, it surely won’t produce friendship.

If we really want good friends, we got to take the initiative to be good friends to others. Making friends isn’t automatic. It takes intentional planning, work and giving from our part.

How can you be a good friend to others? Here are five practical suggestions which you can apply today on.

1. Talk to people you like. Just dial their numbers and talk to them over phone. You will be surprised how happy most of them will be to hear your voice and to know that you care to call them.

2. Spend time with family. If you are married, your spouse is the best friend you can ever have. Your children want you as their friend though most of them may not call you ‘my friend’. Your extended family is also a potential crowd for nurturing friendship. Utilize these avenues and intentionally spend quality time with your family.

3. Extend help to people. There are many around you who need help. Find some of them and extend the needed help. It may be assisting someone at the hospital for an hour or giving financial aid to a jobless person. It can also be encouraging a local retail owner or counseling someone who is going to get married.

4. Attend get-togethers. Get-togethers come in different forms like birthday parties, wedding, annual celebrations, conferences, retreats, even memorial services. Participating in such events help you get connected with new people as well as rejuvenate old contacts.

5. Be available for people. If you are a work addict, break it. It is better to be surrounded with people than work! Yes, we must do our work. But we also need to give proper time to building strong relationships with people because one day work will be over but even then, we need people.

Besides these five suggestions, you can also make use of the internet to make genuine friends. If you are not happy with the world of the web, these five ideas are more than enough to enjoy healthy relationships.

So, remember: be a friend to others and you will have good friends!

Question: What do you do to make good friends? Share your comments here.

© Joe Abraham. www.joeandancy.com. June 18, 2012

Image courtesy: freedigitalphotos.net

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About Joe Abraham

I like inspiring people to excel in career and life. For more info, check out the About page.
  • http://joeandancy.com/ Ancy Joe

    Great ! Powerful practical tips.Thanks

    • http://joeandancy.com/ Joe Abraham

      I value that!

  • http://tcavey.blogspot.com/ TCAvey

    It takes being a friend to make a friend. I may not like everything someone else does but that  doesn’t mean we can’t be friends.

    I find listening to be very important to making and keeping friends.

    • http://joeandancy.com/ Joe Abraham

      You made a valid point here, TC. If our definition of a ‘friend’ is ‘someone I can agree with 100% in all areas’, then we may not get even a single friend! 

  • http://www.lifeofasteward.com Loren Pinilis

    I think we just have to step up and make those first few awkward steps. A lot of people want friends, but they just want natural, flowing relationships. Often, there’s a little effort that has to be put in before you get to that point.

    • http://joeandancy.com/ Joe Abraham

      I like what you said about ‘awkward steps’. But the results are often rewarding! Thanks for the add, Loren.

  • http://danblackonleadership.com/ Dan Black

    Great point and tips. During church a a group gathering I make it a point to connect with people I don’t know. 

    • http://joeandancy.com/ Joe Abraham

      What you do is commendable, Dan. Sometimes in church gatherings, new comers are ignored and they leave disappointed. I wish there would be many more like you!

  • Bernard Haynes

    Good points Joe. I am more intent on listening to become a better friend.

    • http://joeandancy.com/ Joe Abraham

      That’s great, Bernard. Listening is a skill that helps us create as well as strengthen friendships. I think we must do a balanced “listen-talk-listen” for better results.

  • http://www.matthewreedcoaching.com/ Matthew Reed

    Here through your comment on http://www.michaelhyatt.com Great content and website!
    Proverbs says, “A man who has friends must show himself friendly…”

    • http://joeandancy.com/ Joe Abraham

      You are welcome here, Matthew! Thanks for stopping by and for your encouraging words. I think both of us have something in common: coaching!

  • http://www.2knowmyself.com/ Farouk

    very nice post
    i was just thinking about new ways to make friends
    thank you : )

    • http://joeandancy.com/ Joe Abraham

      You are welcome, Farouk. Glad to know that it is helping you.

  • http://www.tnealtarver.wordpress.com TNeal

     Joe, this resonates with an idea I’m working on in relation to building community. Where do I start? I start at home. I put those ideas into practice with friends. Good, practical advice.

    • http://joeandancy.com/ Joe Abraham

      Yes, home is the best place to start! Then it spreads to friends and extended connections. Thanks TNeal for the add. You are welcome here!

  • Bill Butler

    “The only way to have a friend is to be one.” ~ Raplh Waldo emerson.

    • http://joeandancy.com/ Joe Abraham

      That’s a classic quote! Thanks, Bill.

  • http://www.skipprichard.com/ Skip Prichard

    A great and thoughtful post, Joe.  Having a “friendship mentality” and always looking to add friends is a powerful mindset.

    • http://joeandancy.com/ Joe Abraham

      Thanks, Skip. 

  • http://www.2knowmyself.com/ Farouk

    very nice post
    i was thinking about expanding my social relations few days ago
    glad i came across your post
     

    • http://joeandancy.com/ Joe Abraham

      Thanks Farouk for your visit and comments.